Wavedown Island Pier Get's New Attraction

A new attraction was added to the Wavedown Island pier this weekend, a squidball machine.

The machine, installed and sponsored by the Crab & Crab restaurant takes only a quarter and a good turn of the wrist to retrieve a squid part. These parts may be used for feeding the local wildlife, for fishing or for squid soup.



It was the Crab & Grab’s own Chef who installed the unit, though he doesn’t take credit for the idea.

“Aunt Nyce (owner of the Crab & Grab) got some crazy idea about filling this er machine with squid parts.” Chef told us as he was bolting the machine to the dock. “She thinks folks will put in em quarters to feed the turtles.”

Looking through the glass, tentacles, squid parts and a hundred eyeballs are clearly visible. Hopefully you’ll get the part you want.

Surprise Tackle for Surprise Catch

Since the sinking of his fishing vessel, fisherman Hector Gondle has been searching for a way to make ends meet. But a new lure and tackle method proved a surprising replacement for a sunken ship.

“At first I thought I might need to wait tables at the Crab & Crab to earn some money.” Said Hector. “Then I saw your news story about the shark that ate the Christmas lights and it was like a light bulb went on in my head.”



Attaching hooks to the very same string of Christmas lights that was retrieved from the belly of shark caught earlier this week, Hector was able to reel in more fish from the shore than ever was possible from his boat.

“I have been able to reel in more fish from the shore than ever was possible from my boat.” Responded Hector when asked about his large catch. But when asked if he would ever purchase another fishing boat Hector told us he was still saving up for one.

Christmas Lights Recovered From Belly Of Shark

When Tristen Nyce cast her line off the Wavedown Island pier this morning, she expected to catch a fish. She never expected she’d be reeling in a little Christmas spirit.

“I put a worm on my hook, cast the line and then I felt the tug.” Said Tristen as she recalled her fishing experience. “Then as I’m reeling in the line, I notice the water was blinking red, green yellow. ”

The fish, a 2,000 lb great sand mako had apparently eaten the Christmas lights off the recently sunken vessel, the Shelly Shell. Owner of the lost fishing boat, Hector Gondle, was grateful to have the bulbs returned to him.

“I was grateful to have the bulbs returned to me.” Said Mr. Gondle “It was good to have something back after such a big loss.”

After surgically removing the bulbs from the shark, the great fish was release unharmed back into the ocean as part of Wavedown Island’s new Eat It or Release It program.

Shelly Shell Sinks!!

Earlier this month we brought to you the breaking news story of a seagull that had been stealing Christmas bulbs off a fishing vessel. In a strange turn of events, the same boat, the Shelly Shell, sank off the Wavedown Island pier this morning.



“We had just finished replacing all the bulbs that the seagull tooked.” Said Mr. Gondle, owner and fisherman on the Shelly Shell “Then it just sank right off the pier.”


It appears that the bird had been saving the boat all along. The extra weight brought on by the tremendous amount of lights and wire was determined to be the cause of the sinking. If the seagull knew the boat would sink or if it was only stealing the bulbs for it’s own purposes has yet to be determined.

Mystery of the Missing Christmas Lights Solved

As soon as Hector Gondle hung this year’s first Christmas lights to celebrate the season, he noticed that a few strands were missing every day.

“At first I thought it might be some of them there kids playing a joke.” Said Hector when interviewed about the missing lights. “I had um hung all nice and nice on my fishing boat, the Shelly Shell. Looked real perty too.” He added.



It wasn’t until a neighbor, Ms. Coastel notice strange lights moving up and down the beach that it was discovered who the true thief really was.

“I saw these lights moving up and down the beach and thought it were a UFO!” Said Ms. Coastel. “But then I realized it were too small to be a UFO. So I followed it.”

What Ms. Coastel and Hector discovered was not a UFO or teenage pranks but instead was in fact a seagull. It’s possible the seagull was attracted to the lights and thought it would make a good meal or perhaps had plans to use the wire and bulbs as nesting materials.

Crab & Grab Home To Seventy-Seven Metal Marbles

The horrible creature that previously terrorized the customers of the Crab & Grab was recaptured yesterday. After being placed in a holding pen, the monster made a nest and laid 77 eggs.

Both the beast and the nest are viewable from the restaurant window. Premium seating is available in the restaurant’s new stink free zone.

The Crab & Grab is open daily from 6:30 AM till 6:30 PM.

Visit the Crab & Grab Website!

Crab & Grab Home To Metal Monster

A horrible creature was snatched out of the raging sea yesterday, The beast, which experts believe may be related to the prehistoric dinosaurs, was captured by owner Brenda Nyce. Ms. Nyce has informed us that this dangerous creature is safely housed in the lobby of her restaurant.

The restaurant is open daily from 6:30 AM till 6:30 PM.